dating like "having fast food", (1) the whole cycle of dating from
getting start to end of the relationship could only take couple weeks
and (2) they also accept more than one partner at a time. It seems
people "worry" about their "concept" about intimacy and couple
relationship.
It's so common to have sexual relationship among young people or
teenagers, but parents may only ask them not having sex by saying
"Don't make the wrong step!" instead of teaching them do it in a
safe/less harm way. The reason is parents may worry about the
"education" may encourage them to have sex in their early age. If you
are a parent, please expend your way of thinking about safe/less harm
way, it's not only about using condom properly, or how important to be
a virgin (because they may not listen anyway) ! But we want to let
them know how important they are, and be responsible to the
consequences.
Help them to appreciate and respect themselves, body and mind! Not
being a virgin doesn't mean they are less good. Experience from a bad
relationship can help them to be smarter. Help them to understand
themselves and find a partner who suit him/her well which would be
very useful in a long run. Also, marriage is not the only one goal in
our life, it takes an important role, but it can't represent our whole
life!
Casual dating really can help us to learn about this in a "real life",
and we also learn how to take care the break-ups. This is something we
can't learn from lecturing. Also, teenager may not see marriage is
their ultimate of casual dating, maybe it's just part of their life as
a teenager. Also, their concept of marriage/love/relationship would be
quite different from you anyway, before you make judgement/lecturing,
why not understand their viewpoints first?
To all young people, struggle through the teenage time is not easy,
all the best!
- Lilac
Link of the research (Chinese only):
http://www.wenweipo.com/news_print.phtml?news_id=IN1102100051
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1 comment:
Dear Louise,
Thank you for your comment. And one more point to add, I think too many failure experience in relationship also may weaken the self image of a person, which is not healthy as well.
Lilac
(original comment from Louise)
i think that lilac has a good point, these days dating in hong kong is more about finding your feet and getting some life experience before making a serious commitment that you later regret. being married is something to do when you find the right person you can be happy with. how would you know with out a little experience?
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